Posts Tagged 'ruths ramblings'
Category: June 2013 Newsletter (5773:10)
Published on Wednesday, 08 May 2013 17:00
Written by Ruth Rosen
These two words may sound similar but how we affect others when we are judicious could not be more different than how we affect them when we are judgmental.
Who wouldn't want a reputation for being judicious? Wouldn't you? On the other hand, I don't think anyone sets out to be judgmental.
Now sometimes a judicious person can get a bad rap for being judgmental just because people tend to label any view that is less-than-affirming of their beliefs or choices as judgmental. This is an unfortunate illustration of what happens when we don't maintain the integrity of words and their definitions.
But most of us have to work at actually not judging others, at not deserving that label.
The best way I know to avoid being judgmental is to realize that it's part of human nature and to remember that if I don't recognize the tendency in myself, I can easily fall into it.
I came up with the following to try to stay on the right track. Let me know if you find it helpful:
It is judicious to seek out the facts.
It is judgmental to jump to conclusions.
It is judicious to listen to what people have to say.
It is judgmental to ascribe motives to people without hearing them out.
It is judicious to uphold principles as landmarks for one's choices and behavior.
It is judgmental to be unkind to those who either do not choose to believe or live up to those principles.
It is judicious to choose one's closest friends/mentors/influencers from those with shared principles.
It is judgmental to shun those who do not share our principles.
Judicious people are concerned with what is right.
Judgmental people are concerned with being right.
Judicious people recognize their own tendency to be judgmental; it actually helps them to detect and reject their own self-righteousness.
Judgmental people recognize other people's tendency to be judgmental but not their own; they usually mistake their self-righteousness for righteous indignation.
When judicious people are questioned about their choices, they may not like it, but will think it over to see if the questions should merit their concern.
When judgmental people are questioned about their choices, they are likely to dismiss the person who asks as judgmental.
Category: December 2010 Newsletter (5771:4)
Published on Tuesday, 30 November 2010 16:00
Written by Jews for Jesus
Hey Rosen, where you going?"
"It's my lunch hour," Moishe explained, still on his way out [of Gart's sporting goods store where he worked].
"No it's not," was the retort. "We're too busy; we need you to cover." He punctuated his demand with some rather colorful language. Moishe liked and respected three of the four Gart brothers; unfortunately, this happened to be the fourth.
Moishe swallowed hard, forcing himself to remain calm. "But my wife made a special trip. She wouldn't be here if you'd told me earlier you wanted me to work through lunch today."
The man shrugged. "Well, that's too blank bad."
None of the other brothers used language like that in the store, much less in front of a lady.... Moishe barely concealed his anger as he announced once again that he was going to lunch.
"If you do," the other growled, "don't bother coming back—you're fired."
Moishe put a protective arm around his young wife and left without another word.
They walked to their favorite lunch stop: Joe "Awful" Coffee's—where the coffee wasn't awful ...
"You don't have to worry, you know," he told [Ceil] reassuringly, as they slid into their favorite booth. "I'll start looking for another job right away."
"I'm not worried." She tried to match his optimistic tone....
In fact, Moishe already had an idea of the kind of work he wanted to do.... He had heard a radio interview in which [a man] ... insisted that until a person had worked with his hands, he was not worthy to be considered a philosopher.
After lunch, [Moishe] went home and ... began poring over the classified section of the newspaper. He purposely avoided sales opportunities in favor of manual labor. Before long, ... Moishe got [a carpenter's assistant] position.... Six weeks into the job his boss shook his head sadly and said, "Rosen I never seen anybody work so hard and fail so badly. I hate to do this, but I won't be able to use you after this week."
Next he tried driving a truck. That job ended on the very first day—when the boss asked to see his social security card and driver's license.... It had never occurred to Moishe to get a license because he had no car.
...One after another, Moishe attempted a series of jobs for which he was ill-suited.... [He finally] decided that respect for manual labor was all very well, but doing work he was actually good at was even better. When a friend mentioned that the Fairmount Cemetery had an opening for a sales manager, Moishe called and made an appointment for an interview....
Moishe answered the questions put to him confidently, and felt relieved as the interviewer nodded his satisfaction. "You can run the operation however you see fit, as long as sales remain up," the interviewer explained. "You seem very well qualified; the job is yours if you want it." Moishe wanted it.
Moishe's membership at Trinity Baptist Church had brought him into contact with several luminaries from Denver Seminary (then called Conservative Baptist Seminary in Denver), including Dr. Vernon Grounds, who, at that time was the dean.1 Dr. Grounds had shown himself a friend to Moishe, and through him, Moishe learned that many seminary students needed part-time work. He was welcome to come visit the seminary if he wished. Moishe felt that ministers-in-training would be sensitive in caring for bereaved customers. He visited the seminary and recruited his entire sales team from the student body.
It was the kind of move he would later refer to as "convergence" because it brought together multiple purposes. It provided compassionate care for his customers and it helped the theological students cover their school and personal expenses.
Selling burial plots wasn't nearly as much fun as selling cameras, but Moishe did well at it—and the sales job at Fairmount Cemetery turned out to be an important, if brief, chapter in his life. One of the men he hired from the seminary helped him to take the next step in his call to ministry ... a step that would help prepare him to change the face of Jewish missions.
- Dr. Grounds later became the president of the seminary.
Category: January 2012 Newsletter (5772:5)
Published on Wednesday, 21 March 2012 17:00
Written by Ruth Rosen
from the soon-to-be-published biography of Moishe Rosen
Over the hum of an old air conditioner and the muted yet audible din of street traffic and sirens, a loud voice burst from the other side of a closed office door. The words were muffled, but the tone was unmistakable. Raising a worried eyebrow, Susan Perlman winced and held her breath, straining to listen. The loud voice belonged to her beloved Great Uncle Gutel, who was engaged rather heatedly in conversation with Moishe Rosen.
Gutel, a regional director for the Jewish National fund, had spent much of his adult life raising money to reforest Israel. A devout pillar of the Jewish community, he was very upset that Susan had come to faith in Jesus, and worse yet, was associated with the nefarious Jews for Jesus that he'd read about in the Jewish Press. He blamed Moishe for Susan's move from New York to California and for changing her life. When Uncle Gutel had learned that the notorious Moishe was coming to New York (for the first ever Jews for Jesus summer witnessing campaign), he had asked for an appointment with him.
Now the two were alone in the room that served as Moishe's temporary office, and who knew what might happen next? Uncle Gutel was not only elderly, but very excitable. Susan feared he would get so agitated that he would have a heart attack.
Her worry only increased when a second loud voice interrupted the first, its cadence punctuated by the stutter that sometimes invaded Moishe's speech when his mind moved faster than his mouth—or when he was trying to get a word in edgewise. But to Susan's great relief, the shouting only lasted a minute, before both voices suddenly decreased in volume. Could they actually be having a calm, civilized conversation? The two were in there for a long time while Susan sat in the other room, alternately worrying and trying to concentrate on her work. At last the door opened, and Uncle Gutel came out.
Moishe's bulky six-foot frame appeared in the doorway, looking thoughtful.
"So, Moishe, what happened?"The tightness of Susan's attempt at a light tone betrayed the concern underlying her curiosity.
Moishe smiled reassuringly. "You know, Sue, I learned a lot from your uncle. After he calmed down, I asked him how he went about raising money for the Jewish National fund. He said he always tried to let people know personally how much he appreciated their support and encouragement. That's something I've always felt was important, so I asked what he did to express his appreciation.
"I guess you know that since your uncle doesn't drive, he's always taking trains and buses to visit people and make presentations for the cause. Well he told me how he put those travel times to use. He'd buy postcards, and while he rode along, he'd write personal notes thanking donors he'd met in previous places. It became a regular part of his routine, sending those handwritten personal postcards. I think that's a great idea, don't you? Maybe we should be writing personal postcards to our donors."
"Yeah, okay, but ... you two ... you parted as friends?" Susan was pleased that Moishe liked her uncle's postcard idea, but she was a lot more interested in how her uncle had responded to Moishe.
"Well, I don't know that your uncle would appreciate being referred to as my friend, but I think he would agree that we are now at least respectful and cordial acquaintances. Your uncle is a wise man who understands how to relate to people. I think I'd like us to try out that donor postcard thing."
Susan smiled with relief. "I guess it went well. That's a real answer to prayer. And ... about the postcards, Moishe ... I think you're right. It just might work for Jews for Jesus, too—if you can get people to do it."
Earlier this year David Brickner wrote an article titled, "Launchers," inspired by William Wilberforce and his zeal to find ways to "launch" into gospel conversations. Jews for Jesus has been using our own style of "launchers" for many years. Maybe you know from your own life and witness, these opportunities can be found everywhere!